ᐅ Which type of housing suits me? Probably not a house...

Created on: 16 Feb 2020 12:10
K
Klangvoll
Good day!

May I please tap into the collective intelligence of this forum for a very basic question? I assume many people here have given a lot of thought to the topic of "living," so I hope to get some input.

First of all: Twenty years ago, I built a house on my parents’ property in a suburb of Berlin. I was in my mid-20s at the time. Now I am in my mid-40s and still live there alone, because this type of living arrangement (house with a garden in a suburb and my parents right next door) seems to be a total deal-breaker for women in Berlin. I should mention that I don’t generally have much luck with women and have to fight hard for every single date. Whenever a woman did come over—which was very rare—that was also the last date.

Now I’m wondering: What are my chances of changing my living situation? And what kind of living arrangement would better suit my situation? Obviously, the house with the garden is not the answer. I spent three years building it at the time and mostly paid from ongoing income, since I’ve always had good projects and earned well. Since moving in, I have been investing the monthly rent I was saving into a stock fund, and I now have about 400,000 EUR (about $440,000) saved up. Of course, that’s not enough for a plot of land and a new house somewhere else. I also don’t want to get into debt.

I cannot sell my house, since it is built on my parents’ land. From what I understand, the property still legally belongs to my parents, even though I paid for the construction. Renting it out is not an option either, since my parents don’t want strangers on their property. Leaving it empty is out of the question for me because of my social conscience, and it would also be economically pointless.

What options do you see? I have never lived in a rented apartment or a multi-family building, so I don’t know if owning a condominium (flat/apartment) would be a solution for me. I am always worried that someone above me might fall asleep with a cigarette or someone next door might tamper with their gas heating.

I am open to all ideas, including ones I haven’t thought of yet. I can even imagine buying a boat and living on it year-round. I could partly offset the cost of the mooring by no longer needing a cleaning service. This would also allow me to adapt my place of residence flexibly according to circumstances. For example, when others have to leave their apartments because a bomb needs to be defused nearby, I could simply move my floating home outside the evacuation zone for that time. That doesn’t sound too bad. I just don’t know how that would go over with women. It probably can’t be worse than now…

What do you think?

Sebastian
B
Bookstar
16 Feb 2020 13:14
Klangvoll schrieb:
I have only rejected someone after finding out on a date that she was a "concerned citizen" or an AfD supporter.
That sounds very ideological. Maybe consider if this is the right approach. I would also have an issue at first if my future partner voted Green or Left, but that wouldn’t be a deal breaker. Likewise, if she were religious, I could accept that. A person is much more than that. Just a tip.
K
Klangvoll
16 Feb 2020 13:18
My parents would view any decision I make that deviates from the paths they have set as deeply ungrateful.

And it should be self-evident that you don’t get involved with a woman from the new right-wing spectrum who generally holds prejudices against certain groups of people.
B
Bookstar
16 Feb 2020 13:29
Don’t let prejudices and stereotypes guide you. Much of what you have posted so far follows this pattern. No wonder you haven’t had success with women. You could look like Brad Pitt and it still wouldn’t make a difference.
Y
ypg
16 Feb 2020 13:35
Klangvoll schrieb:

My parents would consider any decision I make that deviates from the path they set as deeply ungrateful.

It sounds like you are being controlled by your parents and are subordinating yourself to them.
Klangvoll schrieb:

And it should be obvious that you don’t get involved with a woman from the new right-wing spectrum who generally holds negative views against certain groups of people.

Nothing is absolute.
K
Klangvoll
16 Feb 2020 13:44
Some things are non-negotiable. However, this is not a widespread issue and has only occurred about three times so far. There was also one case from the far-left spectrum, which is no better.
K
Klangvoll
16 Feb 2020 14:01
But let's get back to my original question. What about alternative living arrangements? For example, how does living on a boat come across? Would that be seen as innovative, or would it create the impression of a socially withdrawn eccentric? I just need to make sure I can continue working in my profession—so far, my recording studio is located in my basement...