ᐅ Dissatisfied with new construction due to other options now available
Created on: 27 Sep 2021 12:51
C
Crossy
I was just about to create a second account for this thread, but in the end, I decided against it. I’m not even sure if this thread belongs in the financing section. The purpose of this thread is not to show off; I’ve been thinking about this for a while now, and my dissatisfaction is growing. Maybe some of you have had similar experiences, and I would be interested to know what you did.
I’m unhappy with our house. Not because it has any serious defects. It suits our current life situation, we have enough space, and next spring the garden will finally be finished and look great. Like many others, during the planning and construction phase, we set priorities because of our budget and gave up on some nice extras. Now, nearly 2 years after the financing was completed, our financial situation has changed significantly.
When we arranged the financing, I was just returning to work after my second parental leave, filling in as a temporary replacement during another parental leave. I knew the job was poorly paid (considering the required qualifications), but the overall package worked well, and I was confident I could manage it alongside the children. I always believed I would earn more in the long term and that this was only a transition back to work. Nevertheless, we based our financing on our income at the time because the financial future, even with good prospects, was uncertain. Therefore, we chose a more conservative approach and did not rely on future salary increases or push our budget to the limit.
Now, almost 2 years later, our financial situation looks completely different. I’m still with the same company but no longer in a temporary replacement role—I’m now a department head, and I have increased my working hours to fulfill this leadership position. Meanwhile, my husband has changed employers and was promoted. All in all, our combined income is about $4,000 more per month. And now I am annoyed by all the little things in the house that, in hindsight, wouldn’t have been a problem for us. With an additional $100,000–150,000, our house would be my dream home.
Many things cannot be retrofitted easily or without significant effort. I wish my dissatisfaction would fade over time so I could enjoy our very nice house and our financial freedom, but mentally I am thinking about selling and looking at plots nearby. My husband is bothered by a few things in the house as well but is generally more content and mainly wary of the hassle involved in building a new house.
I’m unhappy with our house. Not because it has any serious defects. It suits our current life situation, we have enough space, and next spring the garden will finally be finished and look great. Like many others, during the planning and construction phase, we set priorities because of our budget and gave up on some nice extras. Now, nearly 2 years after the financing was completed, our financial situation has changed significantly.
When we arranged the financing, I was just returning to work after my second parental leave, filling in as a temporary replacement during another parental leave. I knew the job was poorly paid (considering the required qualifications), but the overall package worked well, and I was confident I could manage it alongside the children. I always believed I would earn more in the long term and that this was only a transition back to work. Nevertheless, we based our financing on our income at the time because the financial future, even with good prospects, was uncertain. Therefore, we chose a more conservative approach and did not rely on future salary increases or push our budget to the limit.
Now, almost 2 years later, our financial situation looks completely different. I’m still with the same company but no longer in a temporary replacement role—I’m now a department head, and I have increased my working hours to fulfill this leadership position. Meanwhile, my husband has changed employers and was promoted. All in all, our combined income is about $4,000 more per month. And now I am annoyed by all the little things in the house that, in hindsight, wouldn’t have been a problem for us. With an additional $100,000–150,000, our house would be my dream home.
Many things cannot be retrofitted easily or without significant effort. I wish my dissatisfaction would fade over time so I could enjoy our very nice house and our financial freedom, but mentally I am thinking about selling and looking at plots nearby. My husband is bothered by a few things in the house as well but is generally more content and mainly wary of the hassle involved in building a new house.
Crossy schrieb:
In total, we're talking about roughly 4k more per month. You’re 36 and 37 with children aged 4 and 6 years. Being able to manage your family life comfortably with 4k less monthly stress under the "how much longer can we afford the house" threshold is enviable luck, and the downside of “could-have-had-another-star kitchen” is a minor issue ;-)
What was the final status regarding https://www.hausbau-forum.de/threads/feedback-zu-grundriss-von-hanghaus.25227/ – and where is the result posted in the completed house pictures thread?
https://www.instagram.com/11antgmxde/
https://www.linkedin.com/company/bauen-jetzt/
M
Myrna_Loy27 Sep 2021 15:30You can also buy nice second homes. 🙂
[LARGE windows or corner glazing]
That’s primarily an aesthetic choice, right? Or are the rooms too dark?
Fireplace
Can be retrofitted, possibly with compromises on positioning. A built-in model with a coin-operated system could also be considered indoors, but that would require appropriate openings.
Air conditioning
Also retrofittable. I’ve learned that HVAC companies often find very clever solutions for this.
Dining room extended by 1 meter (3 feet 3 inches) to rotate the kitchen island and design it as a "aircraft carrier"
which leads to a different kitchen layout, possibly an additional small room
Would adding a heated conservatory be an option?
KNX (smart home system)
That would really be complex without a major renovation if done comprehensively. But maybe there’s a particular pain point where a targeted solution could be considered?
Flush-mounted doors
Definitely retrofittable.
Focus your efforts in the garden; you can invest a lot of money there and increase the property value. High-quality wooden decking, for example, and you can easily spend five figures on outdoor furniture (there are some really cool options ...). What about a large sunshade sail, or maybe a hot tub underneath? Is a pool a general topic?
Inside the house, there’s a lot you can do as well: art, sculptures. Maybe you currently only have a CPL (Continuous Pressure Laminate) worktop in the kitchen, and you could upgrade to something higher quality?
Buy cars if that’s something you enjoy. Upgrades for vacations, maybe a holiday home? Have you ever wanted your own horse?
There really is so much luxury stuff. You’ve already invested plenty in your living situation. There are many other nice things to consider, even if after years of building, that might be hard at first. Projects are everywhere...
That’s primarily an aesthetic choice, right? Or are the rooms too dark?
Fireplace
Can be retrofitted, possibly with compromises on positioning. A built-in model with a coin-operated system could also be considered indoors, but that would require appropriate openings.
Air conditioning
Also retrofittable. I’ve learned that HVAC companies often find very clever solutions for this.
Dining room extended by 1 meter (3 feet 3 inches) to rotate the kitchen island and design it as a "aircraft carrier"
which leads to a different kitchen layout, possibly an additional small room
Would adding a heated conservatory be an option?
KNX (smart home system)
That would really be complex without a major renovation if done comprehensively. But maybe there’s a particular pain point where a targeted solution could be considered?
Flush-mounted doors
Definitely retrofittable.
Focus your efforts in the garden; you can invest a lot of money there and increase the property value. High-quality wooden decking, for example, and you can easily spend five figures on outdoor furniture (there are some really cool options ...). What about a large sunshade sail, or maybe a hot tub underneath? Is a pool a general topic?
Inside the house, there’s a lot you can do as well: art, sculptures. Maybe you currently only have a CPL (Continuous Pressure Laminate) worktop in the kitchen, and you could upgrade to something higher quality?
Buy cars if that’s something you enjoy. Upgrades for vacations, maybe a holiday home? Have you ever wanted your own horse?
There really is so much luxury stuff. You’ve already invested plenty in your living situation. There are many other nice things to consider, even if after years of building, that might be hard at first. Projects are everywhere...
J
JuliaMünchen27 Sep 2021 15:56Hmm... I think your problem is hard to assess without knowing you personally because it’s difficult to understand the root of this dissatisfaction from the outside. Have you really had to restrict yourselves too much here and actually your house doesn’t suit you or your wishes? Or is this dissatisfaction caused by something else entirely, which isn’t directly related to the house or the windows themselves (for example, that you’ve always had to make compromises and now finally want to enjoy and show some success, just as an example)? If I were you, I would start by asking myself honestly whether a new house that meets all your wishes would really make me happier, or if it’s this very human feeling that “there could always be something better,” which people often apply to partners, jobs, or their appearance, and then end up less happy than before, only realizing afterward that good was actually good enough.
My parents were in the same situation as you. After buying the house, my dad unexpectedly made a phenomenal career leap and could have quickly realized his dream of a Bauhaus-style villa with a view over a valley. But he acknowledged that my mom was right—that our terraced house with a large garden was perfect for us. We had great neighbors with many children, a fantastic floor plan, a lovingly furnished and cozy home, and a quiet residential area at a good distance from my dad’s workplace. Unfortunately, my dad passed away suddenly two years ago, which meant that my husband and I could implement almost every fancy feature for building a house that we wanted from the inheritance, if we wished. But we simply don’t—for many things like KNX smart home systems, wood-aluminum windows, or interlocking roof tiles—because it’s not worth the money to us and because my own experience has taught me that family IN the home is the most important thing, and the happiness it brings cannot be replaced by anything else.
That doesn’t mean, of course, that we haven’t fulfilled one or two dreams, and I completely understand if, in hindsight, you feel a bit frustrated—especially with things that are hard to change. Based on my own life experience, I would probably advise you to consider whether “good” really isn’t good enough, since people too often focus on what they don’t have instead of being grateful for the truly beautiful and important things they already do have—things that won’t last forever, like health, family, an intact and peaceful neighborhood, the feeling of having arrived, and so on.
If your house basically suits you: enjoy it for the years to come, make it even more yours, and treat yourself here and there to other luxuries that bring you joy (debt-free living first, amazing trips, a pool, a stylish outdoor kitchen, an extension with large panoramic windows?). And spare yourself the nerve-racking time of searching for a new plot, a second build, and all the stress that this brings along with children on the side.
My parents were in the same situation as you. After buying the house, my dad unexpectedly made a phenomenal career leap and could have quickly realized his dream of a Bauhaus-style villa with a view over a valley. But he acknowledged that my mom was right—that our terraced house with a large garden was perfect for us. We had great neighbors with many children, a fantastic floor plan, a lovingly furnished and cozy home, and a quiet residential area at a good distance from my dad’s workplace. Unfortunately, my dad passed away suddenly two years ago, which meant that my husband and I could implement almost every fancy feature for building a house that we wanted from the inheritance, if we wished. But we simply don’t—for many things like KNX smart home systems, wood-aluminum windows, or interlocking roof tiles—because it’s not worth the money to us and because my own experience has taught me that family IN the home is the most important thing, and the happiness it brings cannot be replaced by anything else.
That doesn’t mean, of course, that we haven’t fulfilled one or two dreams, and I completely understand if, in hindsight, you feel a bit frustrated—especially with things that are hard to change. Based on my own life experience, I would probably advise you to consider whether “good” really isn’t good enough, since people too often focus on what they don’t have instead of being grateful for the truly beautiful and important things they already do have—things that won’t last forever, like health, family, an intact and peaceful neighborhood, the feeling of having arrived, and so on.
If your house basically suits you: enjoy it for the years to come, make it even more yours, and treat yourself here and there to other luxuries that bring you joy (debt-free living first, amazing trips, a pool, a stylish outdoor kitchen, an extension with large panoramic windows?). And spare yourself the nerve-racking time of searching for a new plot, a second build, and all the stress that this brings along with children on the side.
Sounds a lot like perfectionism… I say that too, because I know it from myself 😀
Many things bothered me again and again, sometimes small details… sometimes caused by myself, sometimes due to poor advice.
Everyone here has their own opinion on this, but my advice: look at it positively—new beautiful house and a great financial situation. You will (probably) still not be completely satisfied after all the renovations or a new build. There’s always room for improvement… watch one TV show and you start thinking here and there it could be a bit better.
How about this thought: the house is perfect for now with kids, garden, space, and so on… later in life, the garden and cleaning might become too much work. Then a nice penthouse apartment in a great location might be the right choice. It works well even into old age… all on one level, accessible for people with limited mobility. Depending on the situation, that could be the deciding factor whether you can still live at home or not. Even if only one partner needs care or is looked after by the other. It really makes a difference whether you have to keep going up and down stairs all the time, and so on. You could already put your money to work smartly now and, once the kids have moved out or so, consider starting a new property project to some extent.
Many things bothered me again and again, sometimes small details… sometimes caused by myself, sometimes due to poor advice.
Everyone here has their own opinion on this, but my advice: look at it positively—new beautiful house and a great financial situation. You will (probably) still not be completely satisfied after all the renovations or a new build. There’s always room for improvement… watch one TV show and you start thinking here and there it could be a bit better.
How about this thought: the house is perfect for now with kids, garden, space, and so on… later in life, the garden and cleaning might become too much work. Then a nice penthouse apartment in a great location might be the right choice. It works well even into old age… all on one level, accessible for people with limited mobility. Depending on the situation, that could be the deciding factor whether you can still live at home or not. Even if only one partner needs care or is looked after by the other. It really makes a difference whether you have to keep going up and down stairs all the time, and so on. You could already put your money to work smartly now and, once the kids have moved out or so, consider starting a new property project to some extent.
11ant schrieb:
You are 36 and 37 years old with children aged 4 and 6. Being able to live a relaxed family life about $4,000 below the "how much longer can we afford this house" stress level is an enviable situation, and the downside of potentially having one more kitchen on the side is bearable ;-)
What was the final status regarding https://www.hausbau-forum.de/threads/feedback-zu-grundriss-von-hanghaus.25227/ – and (where) can the result be found in the house pictures thread?Well researched. I believe I am still anonymous here, so there won’t be any pictures. The floor plans shown in the linked thread were the initial drafts from different general contractors. Our house is roughly based on post 15.